User:Andy Raff
Magic Theory
General Overview
The new magic pages are a good resource and one that I think will be much appreciated. I don't actually have a massive amount of feedback for these - there's the usual stuff like needing links, grammar and spelling gone over to catch the errors, but the actual content largely seems solid.
The common use of the concepts of why the Lore in question is powerful, why it's dangerous and what it feels like to wield it are all good and I think could do with a bit of extra word count to expand and detail them further.
The listing of Resonance and Dissonance is good, and clearly helpful with understanding what the Realm's magic can and cannot do. That said, the pages are quite varied in how much coverage they give for each, meaning that some Realms' pages give a lot less guidance, especially around Dissonance where both Winter and Night are extremely limited.
If there were more wordcount and time put into it, I'd say a more detailed examination of some of the magical theory elements via mentioning in-setting details would be good. There are a few really nifty details in there, like the resonances with certain materials that aren't immediately obvious or explicit - more like that, more bits and pieces, more setting details and suggested tools and advised elements of practice would make the pages stronger. It'd be very cool to have some details around events or experiments that confirmed some of these resonances and dissonances, failed attempts that ran up hard against dissonances, historical place and character names related to such things that give mage players more elements they can bring into their own IC discussions of these theories and concepts.
Spring Magic
Spring magic is in great need of having a page that gives it some good PR as a cool Lore that people should take, and this page does go some way towards achieving that. In fact it actually makes some of the healing side of the Lore sound a fair bit cooler than the rituals actually are in practice!
That said, it seems notable that Spring has more elements listed under Dissonance than any other Realm, combined under not many entries for Resonance - this may reinforce some peoples' opinions of Spring being excessively limited somewhat.
The line in the Fertility section that says 'And there is no denying that healing magic can cause the subject to develop briar lineage if the wounds are severe.' is wrong, isn't it? My understanding is that it *doesn't* cause subjects to develop briar lineage but that it causes people who already have Briar lineage to manifest it physically.
Summer Magic
Looks pretty good - Summer was fairly straightforward as was, but this page adds some nice clarifications around what falls into its remit and also points out some of the less obvious things that are very Summer-y. I especially liked the note that metal lies more under Autumn's purview, while stone is very resonant with Summer. It's that sort of detail that really adds to both the mechanical approach to rituals (you need to take that resonance into account when planning what rituals to try and get projections for) and the in-character discussion and debate around the nature of magic.
Autumn Magic
This page was definitely needed for Autumn due to its slightly less straightforward nature compared to some of the other Realms, so pleased to see it talk about correspondence, scale and the like - including that it brings attention to the fact that Autumn can mess with those things as well as buff them. This helps make it clear that Autumn isn't just the magic of money and loyalty.
What does strike me is that what we have here about Autumn, in particular the section 'Autumn hates making individuals stronger. It likes to grant influence, not strength or prowess. It despises the heroic warrior king. Where Summer is about doing it yourself, or empowering a champion, Autumn is about getting someone else to do it, or empowering a group.' just makes Sum of the Parts stick out like a sore thumb even more. Not only do we have an Autumn ritual that seems wildly underpriced in Magnitude based off the general calculations used for other rituals of its kind, it very much involves empowering a champion and making an individual stronger. There is the group element to it, and the trade of the hits, but Sum of the Parts continues to stand out as a ritual that has a hefty price break for a 'disadvantage' that is barely a disadvantage at all.
Winter Magic
Generally good. Notably Winter magic seems to have a huge list of resonant elements, which would be fine as they're mostly pretty tightly linked thematically... except for herbs. It stands out on the list as a kinda weird entry. The actual entry for herbs is also really unconvincing as to why herbs specifically are a resonant thing - it's a rather feeble explanation, to be honest.
The Dissonance list for Winter is really short, to the point where I think it's not as helpful as it could be for people trying to figure out the things that Winter can't do. The impression that the vast list of resonances and tiny list of dissonances gives is that Winter is a catch-all Lore that can pretty much do most things.
Day Magic
Pretty good - as with Summer and stone, and Autumn and metal, I really appreciated the bit mentioning crystals for Day. It's the kind of thing that is implicitly heavily implied, but having it explicitly discussed is beneficial.
Night Magic
Looks good - however, as with Winter, the Dissonance section is really short, and I think this won't be so helpful as some other Realm Lore pages for helping players figure out what lies outside the Realm's purview.